Three Little Things

Thing One

The Time: Yesterday at work, on the phone.

Chiara:May I speak to Herbert Thackwhistle, please?

Nice Older Lady: Herbert Thackwhistle? Which one?

Chiara: Uhh…

Nice Older Lady: See, we’ve got the old Herbert Thackwhistle, and then we have the middle Herbert Thackwhistle, and then we have the young Herbert Thackwhistle! Three Herbert Thackwhistles living here! Which one are you calling for?

Chiara: (frantically shuffling papers): I’m looking for Herbert Thackwhistle Junior, please.

Nice Older Lady: (off the phone) Are you Junior? Or is that little Herbie over there? Which one is the junior?

Voice From Off The Phone: Wjopsu jsiudls mouels byoysd blayorynlyhe haoyis.

Nice Older Lady (to Chiara) Did you get that?

Chiara No ma’am. Uh, I’m looking for the Herbert Thackwhistle who has an amputation. Please. If that’s all right with you.

Nice Older Lady (off the phone): Do you have an amputation?

Voice From Off The Phone Of course I have an amputation! Can’t you see I’m missing a leg, woman!


Thing Two

The Time: yesterday at lunch

Girl Chiara Works With: Yeah, this one time I was so into my book that I totally missed my bus stop! I was all, what? Where am I? It was so crazy.

Chiara: Oh, man, not me. I have, like, this secret Bus Sensor thing that just tells me when to get off, even if I’m really into my book. It’s great. I never miss my stop.

The Time: this morning on the bus, as it goes past my stop and over a bridge

Chiara What? Where am I?


Thing Three

“Dear Chiara Chiaraslastname,

Many thanks for your kind note. I have come to believe writing is a collaboration, not a solo–the writer and the reader collaborate to make the book. With collaborators like you around, my life’s pretty easy. Always Coming Home is special to me, and it pleased me to know how much it has given you.

                               With best wishes,

                               Ursula K. Le Guin

Do you think Ursula K. Le Guin knows about online journals? Because I think she really hit the nail on the head, there.


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